After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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