porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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