ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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