Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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