I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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