Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(208): View more from Idaho

I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.

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(928): View more from Arizona

He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high

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(519): View more from Ontario

We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.

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(516): View more from New York

He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.

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(210): View more from Texas

my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM

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(647): View more from Ontario

I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive

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