U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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