ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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