In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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