im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize