would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
