He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
