do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
