What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
How does it feel to date your dad?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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