your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
