with your own penis?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
The air taste purple.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
