it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
