I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
soo... how was my night?
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