What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
