We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
