awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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