Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
