She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
