And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize