Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
