he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
