is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
