I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize