There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
