i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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