they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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