So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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