remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize