why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Just high enough for therapy.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize