Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You can't just leave with hair like that
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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