I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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