i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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