my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
