Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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