found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
