some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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