We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
