The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he was CRYING into my vagina
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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