Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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