I puked a lego.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Success! We fucked roommates!
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
