I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
