No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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