Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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