I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
