How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
