Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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