I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I need to calm my uterus...
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
