Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
